After loading all of the Pope’s luggage into the limo (and he doesn’t travel light), the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb.
“Excuse me, Your Eminence,” says the driver. “Would you please take your seat so we can leave?”
“Well, to tell you the truth,” says the Pope, “they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I’d really like to drive today.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t let you do that. I’d lose my job! And what if something happens?” protests the driver, already regretting his day.
“There might be something extra in it for you,” says the Pope.
Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs behind the wheel.
The driver quickly regrets it when, after leaving the airport, the Supreme Pontiff floors it, speeding up to 105 mph.
“Please slow down, Your Holiness!” pleads the terrified driver.
But the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens.
“Oh dear God, I’m going to lose my license,” moans the driver.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches. The officer takes one look, walks back to his motorcycle, and radios in:
“I need to talk to the Chief.”
The Chief comes on. “What’s going on?”
“I just pulled over a limo going 105.”
“So bust him,” says the Chief.
“I don’t think we want to do that… he’s really important.”
“All the more reason!”
“No, I mean really important.”
“Who is it? The mayor?”
“Bigger.”
“The governor?”
“Bigger.”
“Well then… who is it?!”
“I think it’s God.”
“What makes you think it’s God?”
“He’s got the Pope as his limo driver!”
North of Nowhere
We Got It Wrong!
A young monk arrives at a monastery and is assigned to help the other monks copy ancient church canons and laws by hand.
divorce
Isang matandang lalaki sa Phoenix ay tumawag sa kanyang anak na lalaki sa New York at sinabing, "Ayokong sirain ang araw mo, pero kailangan ko sabihin sa iyo na magdi-divorce na kami ng nanay mo. Sapat na ang 45 years na paghihirap."
isa, dalawa, tatlo
Isang lalaki at babae ang nasa kanilang honeymoon pagkatapos ng mahaba at napakasayang ligawan. Sa kanilang honeymoon, nagpasya silang dalhin ang kanilang mga kabayo sa magagandang mountain pass ng Europe.
South of Somewhere
I have a great joke about time travel, but you didn’t like it.
The reason why so few people are agreeable in conversation is that each is thinking more about what he intends to say than about what he is being answered.
I don’t have a ‘problem’ with binge-watching; I have a deep, emotional commitment to finishing a story before the sun realizes I’m still awake.